


out of depth

by clarebiscus



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: Thrawn Series - Timothy Zahn (2017)
Genre: Chiss Ascendancy (Star Wars), M/M, Thrawn Treason, post thrawn treason, ronan: hm eli is kinda pretty tho, set in the ascendancy after thrawns disapearance, the thrawn/eli is ambiguous, work friend accidentally becomes real friend
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-29
Updated: 2019-10-29
Packaged: 2021-01-08 04:33:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,097
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21229874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clarebiscus/pseuds/clarebiscus
Summary: hi i wrote this at work bcus inspiration is a fickle mistress anwyays its ??? idk its abut ronan discovering eli is Really upset about thrawn going missing and he has No idea how to comfort ppl. him and eli cough a lot due to general discomfort. are they sick? probably





	out of depth

-

Ronan hears them before he sees them. He can’t make out any of the accursed Chiss dialect, but he does recognize the twang of Lieutenant Commander Vanto’s accent, which seems to manifest itself no matter the language. His voice is raised, and he sounds distressed. Ronan hears Ar’alani’s voice too, so he waits outside the briefing room. Vanto hurries out the door and past him, and if the look on his face is anything to go by Ar’alani had given him bad news. Vanto doesn’t seem to notice that he’s there, which bothers Ronan slightly. In the Empire, people at least respected him enough to acknowledge his presence. Here? He really was a nobody.

Ar’alani steps out moments later, sees him and frowns. She begins to speak in the trade language Sy Bisti (which Vanto had insisted he learn very quickly much to his chagrin) very slowly- though for which of their sakes he wasn’t sure.  
“Grand Admiral Thrawn has been…” she trails off, unsure of how to continue. “Compromised. His fleet was lost, I am told at the hands of a young….” her face scrunches up and she mutters in Cheunh. “Sky-no what is it…Jedi.. A young Jedi and his group of insurgents.”  
_Jedi? Lost?_ Lost _how?_  
“Lost, Admiral?” One Jedi can’t destroy a fleet. Even outlandish old Clone Wars rumors didn’t boast impossible feats like that. Surely Thrawn was smarter than some rogue Jedi?

“Lost. Lost in the unknown regions. Not fully destroyed I am told. The details are unclear, and confusing at best. I thought you should know as a former agent of the Empire.”  
Ronan nods. “Right. I don’t suppose you’d tell me how the Ascendancy came by this information about the Empire?”  
Ar’alani gives a hint of a wry smile  
“I shall not.” He didn’t think so. No one told him a damn thing.  
He nods and goes to walk away when she cuts in.  
“Ronan. You may want to tread lightly on this matter with Lieutenant Commander Ivant. Him and Thrawn were…” she purses her lips, “close.”

-

_Close._  
He does not find the opportunity to bring up the matter with Vanto because he doesn’t see him. At all. If he didn’t know any better he’d say the man was avoiding him, which was ridiculous because they didn’t even spend time together, but all the same he barely caught a glimpse of him.

A whole week after the news of Thrawn’s disappearance, he runs into Vanto staring intently at a screen hooked up in one of the lower level rooms set aside for storing data and running numbers.  
“Oh. I didn’t know you were here.”  
Vanto startles and looks up. Dark circles line his large brown eyes, and his usually pleasant features look rather worse for wear.  
“You look awful,” he tells him.  
“Thank you,” Vanto moves to get up and Ronan realizes how bad that sounded.  
“No wait, I don’t mean, like-ah.” He sighs. “I mean you look _unhealthy._ Are you…okay?”  
“I’m fine.”  
Ronan rolls his eyes. “Yeah I believe that. Is this about, uh,” Ar’alani’s voice drifts into his mind. _Him and Thrawn were close._ “Thrawn?”  
At the mention of Thrawn’s name Vanto stiffens and turns back to his screen. Touchy.  
“You heard about that, huh.” He lets out a hollow laugh. “Purrgils. Can you believe that? His fleet got attacked by Purrgils, after all that, all that time, all that-” his voice wavers a little and Ronan suddenly feels dangerously out of his element. Vanto sounded upset. _Oh god,_ Ronan thinks,_ what if he starts crying-_  
“Nevermind,” Vanto says shakily. “It doesn’t matter now. I just wish…” he trails off. Ronan clears his throat, and then says the last thing he wants to say, because he is not a horrible person no matter what a certain Commodore Faro might think. And if comforting a distraught deserter (_fellow deserter,_ his mind unhelpfully supplies) was what he needed to do to prove that, well, no one can say he didn’t rise to the occasion.

“You just wish what?”

“I had so much faith in him, Ronan. Thrawn was-_is_\- special. I’ve never met anyone like that, you understand? Thrawn w-is someone who….I wanted to be part of what he was creating. He had, _has,_ these grand plans, these plans that he let me be a part of and I just wish …well, I wish he got to to see them to the end.”  
Ronan nods, surprisingly understanding of where Vanto was coming from. He felt the same kind of admiration for Director Krennic and his visions for the Empire.  
“Now he’s gone, lost or-or _dead_,” Vanto takes a shaky breath.  
Ronan puts what he hopes is a reassuring hand on his shoulder. “I’m sure it’s hard to lose someone you looked up to.”  
Vanto looks away and is silent for a moment. “It’s not just that. We…we were friends. I don’t just miss his big ideas, or his genius. I miss the way he spoke to me. Like I was someone special.”  
“I…see,” Ronan says, realizing he may have bit off more than he could chew in comforting Vanto. He thought it was like a soldier mourning his favourite commander, maybe even his mentor figure, but Vanto didn’t just sound sad. He sounded _heartbroken._  
‘You really admired him, huh.”  
There is a long silence.  
“Something like that.” Vanto says quietly, more to himself than Ronan.  
Oh. _Oh._  
Ronan clears his throat. He’d done that a lot today.  
“Right. Well, I better not distract you any more from your work-”  
“I was leaving soon anyways.” Great. Ronan had all but exhausted his admittedly limited emotional support resources. They make their way to the building they both have their quarters in. Ronan notices a small item in Vanto’s hand.  
“What’s that?”  
“Oh. It’s Thrawn’s journal.”  
Of _course_ it was.

-

Vanto sits next to him at breakfast the following day. He coughs slightly and motions toward the food. “It’s better with the spice that’s kept near the kitchens. If you wanted to know.”  
“Noted.”  
“Thanks. For last night, I mean. Talking to me. Sorry if it was weird, I didn’t mean to get so…” he coughs again.  
Ronan shrugs, and pointedly doesn’t look up from his food. “I’ve had weirder conversations.” He hadn’t.  
Vanto laughs. A nice sound, one Ronan wouldn’t mind hearing again. He doesn’t dwell on that thought.  
“Okay. Well, thanks anyways.”  
They eat their meal in a relatively amicable silence, and if Vanto’s eyes look a little red and puffy, well, Ronan doesn’t comment on it.

-

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading. i love ronan even if he is kind of an asshole, and my friends tease me for it. let me know what u think!! have a good day bye


End file.
